Use the New Year to reflect on what is working, getting to the root of what is not, and setting intentions for the year ahead.
It is inevitable. The end of the year rolls around and I get asked numerous times how I feel about resolutions. The honest answer is my usual perspective on most topics, I can see the benefits and the downfalls; I can see both sides.
Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE the energy surrounding the New Year! It’s all sparkly and magical and whatnot. I love the opportunity to reflect on how I spent my time, how I felt, the impact I had, and the lessons I learned from the past 12 months. I love level setting where I am at in the larger destination of my life and my goals, which are around feeling good and being the best version of me I can be.
As a counselor and coach, I appreciate goals and believe there is so much power in clarifying what you want and how you want to feel to help guide you to where you want to be. If we don’t spend time considering what we want, saying it aloud and taking conscious daily action to get there, we might not experience the movement we desire.
So, if we are going to set intentions for the New Year my approach is to dig deep to REFLECT and RISE, which can be done answering the following questions:
- What are you most proud of from 2019?
- How did you grow and stretch yourself?
- Where was the struggle and what did you learn? What is left in the growth journey?
- When looking at where you want to be and how you want to feel – what strengths can you leverage to get there? This is all about the rise and stepping into your gems and power!
- What will hold you back? Look beyond the obvious for this one. For example, if you desire to be healthy but what is getting in your way of taking the very best care of yourself is an unconscious belief that you are not worthy, well let’s do some healing and re-wiring around that belief, because it might continue to block you, even in your best efforts. Or, if your goal is to find love yet you find yourself in the pattern of sabotaging dates before they even happen, let us get to the root of the sabotage by asking what you are afraid of, how are you showing up and are you acting in alignment with what you really want? You see, people want the simple formula for success and well-being but, the truth is, we need to look under the hood for what is really influencing our thoughts, feelings, beliefs, and behaviors.
- What will you need to release and shed to get where you want to go? So you can rise more easily and naturally.
- What is ONE THING you can commit to daily that is in alignment with where you want to be? The RISE must include action and seeing opportunities that surround you.
- Who and what support do you need?
- How do you want to feel?
- What will it be like when you get there? Sit in a little visualization of this. Imagine yourself where you want to be, notice how you look and feel, where you are, who you are with and just indulge in the experience. Use this technique as a motivator when you need a boost to stay the course!
In my experience, the key to making resolutions and intentions useful, meaningful, and successful, is to resolve the underlying issues that are preventing you from living and feeling your best while consciously acknowledging all that you already are and the strengths you already carry within to help you get there. It is not as simple as “I am going to lose weight” or “Get that promotion” or “Set healthier boundaries.”
It is reflecting on what is causing you to engage in unhealthy patterns – hint: we sometimes engage in these behaviors to avoid actually FEELING.
So, in the New Year, let us commit to getting to the root of things, of being worthy of healing and transformation, and of stepping into our power to feel our best and therefore do our best.
If you are interested in continuing the conversation about how YOU can Reflect and Rise in your life, view my recent Vlog about this topic or feel free to reach out directly to me here. I look forward to hearing from you!
~ Brooke Jean, MA, LPCC